Protested Change
by Dude72
Summary: What if Buffy didn't like the change in Faith after her stay in prison.


**_Protested Change_**

**A/N: Just a one parter song fic that i did with some free time. Supposed to be set somewhere in the seventh season but i guess that it could go just about anywhere after Faith got out of jail.**

**Summary: Maybe Buffy didn't exactly like the change in Faith after her stay in prison.**

**Disclaimer:I don't own anything at all, Joss owns everything.****I own nothin but the computer i'm writing on.**

**Song: One-Eighty By Summer (Taking Back Sunday)**

**Rating: Whatever the equivilent of PG13 is, i heard that you can have one f-bomb in a PG13 movie so i'm basing my rating on that.**

**Feedback: do it you know you want to, please, it keeps me going and besides what else do have to do with your time other than support some random fourteen-year old.**

* * *

Buffy has always liked that side better. The one that didn't care what happened,didn't give a shit aboutwhose feelings got hurt in the process and what the outcomes were as long as I got what I wanted. 

It was obvious how much I had changed, all those years in prison, well not all that long. But still, when you're locked in a cage like an animal, days seem like years. Even if I really was an animal, and that's what I deserved after all I had done to the only people who seemed to care about me at all.

_**Go on just say it,  
You need me like a bad habit,  
One that leaves you defenseless, dependent, and alone.  
Go on just say it (Are you afraid to?),  
You need me like a bad habit, (Say what you want to, tell me you want to),  
One that leaves you defenseless, dependent, and alone. (Are you afraid to say what you want to, tell me you want to?)**_

But as soon as I got back, as soon as I saw her for the first time in the graveyard, in our natural habitat, of sorts. I could tell something in her had changed. She wasn't the same old B, the one that was always on my ass for one thing or another. I've heard being dead for a few months can do that to ya. i should know when she was gone it felt like i was gone too. But it seemed like she had given up, she realized that I had changed, that the world she lived in, the life she was brought back to live and the people she went through her so called life with, they had all changed and if you ask me, she didn't seem to like that change very much at all.

_**Well, I hold my tongue use it to assess,  
The damage from way back when it mattered,  
But nothing seems important anymore,  
We're just protecting ourselves from our self,  
And I don't think I'll ever come back down, (I don't think I'll ever come back down),  
I don't think I'll ever come back down, (I don't think I'll ever come back down),  
I don't think I'll ever come back down, (I don't think I'll ever come back…),  
I don't think I'll ever come back…**_

We had both gone back to our slayer mode, our calling, the chosen two, hot chicks with superpowers. We followed the very few rules of slaying, 1.) don't die, 2.)don't get attached to anyone or anything and hopefully you won't get hurt. Well, that second rule was one I made up and I think it was a damn good one at that, but B probably should have followed my genius rule, and maybe all that shit wouldn't have happened to her. Including all the fucked up shit that I did to her before my so-called reform.

And that's when it happened, when I realized something about her and it all came back in a rush of emotions and feelings from the past, ones that I thought I had buried all the while I was residing in prison. All the shit that I did to her surfaced, the whole wounded little bad-assed girl facade I had, the one that wouldn't let anyone else in, let alone try to help me out, especially my sister slayer. The crap that I pulled when I was in Sunnyhell the first time. The stuff that drove her to stabbing me in the gut, aiming to kill, but never really making it that far, just enough physical pain to give me an extended vacation for eight months but enough emotional pain to kill both of us about ten times over. Then when I woke up and went on my little mission of revenge, trying to kill anyone who got in the way. I know what I want, saying sorry isn't enough, but I'm gonna get it, what I want is always mine.

_**Are you ashamed to say what you want to, (tell me you want to.)  
Are you ashamed to say what you want to, (tell me you want to.)  
(Go on just say it) Are you ashamed to... (Go on just say it) Say what you want to? Tell me you want to.  
(Go on just say it) Are you ashamed to... (Go on just say it) Say what you want to? Tell me you want to.**_

I went back to the way I was before it all. Before prison, before hurting everyone who acted like they cared. I knew what I wanted, not just her forgiveness, but her. I guess I was always like that. Want. Take. Have. No matter what the cost, if any of her friends "feelings" were hurt, hell, even when I was in prison I heard from Cordy and the Angel's team that Red was playin' for the other team, so what the hell, why not try. None of it mattered, as long as I got what I wanted, that's her, even if she doesn't believe it. I know it what she wants, I know her, better than she thinks.

**_I'm making the difference,  
It just seems pointless,  
why all the obvious lines got out of focus  
Why can't you just be happy,  
Why can't you just be happy?  
And I don't think I'll ever come back down (I don't think I'll ever come back down),  
I don't think I'll ever come back down (I don't think I'll ever come back down),  
I don't think I'll ever come back down (I don't think I'll ever come back…),  
I don't think I'll ever come back..._**

It's what I want; it's what I know she wants. That's why it's so hard seeing her try to avoid it every time regardless of the way she feels about it all. It's so easy to see, small things, looks, slight touches that last just a second too long to be considered normal and within the range of friendliness.

**_She says "Live up to your first impression,"  
Well my best side was your worst invention,  
you can't seem to live without the intention,  
Why can't you live without the intention?_**

I thought it was what she wanted; she wanted me in a way, just not the supposedly new and improved Faith. The old me. The all unreformy Faith. The one that didn't give a shit. I was wrong, I was off the mark, I didn't hit the damn nail on the head, I hit my damn thumb, and it hurt, like, hell.

**_She says "Live up to your first impression" (Come on, just say it),  
Well my best side was your worst invention (Come on, just say it),  
Why can't you live without the intention (you need me defenseless, dependent),  
Why can't you love without the intention (alone).  
She says "Live up to your first impression" (I just say it),  
Well my best side was your worst invention (I just say it),  
Why cant you live without the intention ( you need me defenseless, dependent)_**

"B, we all know this isn't what you want to hear, but…" She cuts me off with the simple, swift, movement of her small hand through the thickened air.

"Faith, don't you say it, if I hear you say what I think you're going to say one more time, I think I'm going to…" This time I take control; I cut her off the exact same way she did to me just mere seconds ago.

"We need to talk, you may not feel like we need to, but I do, just to get this whole thing out in the open." I know that I'm rambling, but at this second I really don't care because this really needs to come out sooner or later.

"I know how I feel, I think I know how you feel, but…"

Suddenly I've stopped talking, her lips have gotten in the way of this whole talking thing and oh my god…this can't be happening, okay maybe this is happening, yeah, it's happening.

I'm still trying to get words out when suddenly the kiss stops and she gently mumbles against my lips "Faith , you talk too much , just kiss me."

Oh and you can bet that I did, she kisses me , I kiss her back and god is this amazing or what. Her kiss is soft just as I imagined it. Not rough but still full of passion. Shit maybe I wasn't exactly wrong, maybe the change wasn't minded as much as I thought.

_**Why can't you love without the intention (Alone),  
Why can't you love (Defenseless, dependent),  
Why cant you love (Defenseless, dependent),  
Why can't you love…without…love…without (Defenseless, dependent, defenseless, dependent),  
Why can't you love (Defenseless, dependent),  
Why can't you love (Defenseless, dependent),  
Why can't you love…without…love…without (Defenseless, dependent, defenseless, dependent).**_


End file.
